Get out of my head

I really have no idea what to put in a blog. I've kept myself away from them for no real apparent reason. I guess i should start by talking about myself a bit. How do i see myself? Scary question for anyone to answer. I guess these days i see myself as a pretty good person. I've grown a lot in the last few years into what i feel is suitable for where i am in my life. As of late i've been surrounding myself with positive people, some of which are hilarious. (Zed, you know who you are.) And some of which i think have been placed in my life by some miraculous mistake...because really, why do I of all people deserve such loving and wicked awesome people in my everyday life? Zed included...and to be honest, near the top of the list. I know she's reading this and i swear i'm NOT sucking up...i can do that in person <3

I used to be an angry, touchy and extermily defensive person. And i know somewhere under the many layers of my awesomeness those qualitites are still there. I've just supressed...is that healthy? I hope my head doesn't explode. *looks around nervously* But in the past months i've decided i don't like hating everything. Not that i really HATED everything but my pessimism was killing me. Thanks to a few good friends, one terrible break-up and a new HEALTHY relationship i feel i've taken the path to non-head-exploding awareness of the people and things around me. And really...who knew a relationship could be healthy for you? I always assumed it was a test of my endurance and how much i could handle before i should be slitting my wrists....figuratively speaking of course. Not that i didn't know how to love...i just didn't know how to be loved back.

ANYWAYS...enough of that cause i'm sure i'll insert mushy crap throughout the life of my newly found blog (obsession more like, time will tell). On to fun things...like me. I'm fun, i enjoy fun people, i love being immature, crazy, and stupid at times.

My boyfriend can read me like a book and last nite as we played 20 questions while smoking in the back room i picked what i thought would take forever for him to guess.
three seconds after me saying : "OK GO!"
He looks around the room: "Sled"
Me: "DAMMIT, are you freakin kidding me?"
Him: "No...it's the 'cutest' thing here. You always pick the cutest things...if it's not the cutest thing it's the shiniest thing and if it's not that it will take you forever to decide what the sneakiest thing is..cause you're a ninja"

My secret is out...


<--me

le sigh...he knows me way too well.